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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25671706">Wasted</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elexica/pseuds/Elexica'>Elexica</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Elexica does AU-gust 2020 [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Yu-Gi-Oh the Abridged Series, Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime &amp; Manga)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AU-gust 2020, Alcohol, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Fraternity, Attempt at Humor, College, Drinking, Fraternities &amp; Sororities, Humor, M/M, Mokuba joins the most wholesome frat ever, drunk math, ygocollablove</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 04:35:34</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,568</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25671706</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elexica/pseuds/Elexica</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Kaiba gets drunk at Mokuba's fraternity initiation party and does the cute orientation leader's calculus homework.  He's bad at flirting, but he's good at math.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler/Kaiba Seto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Elexica does AU-gust 2020 [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1860052</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>64</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>AUgust 2020</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Wasted</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>FYI – drunk kaiba is abrdiged!kaiba.  Also this is the sweetest, most wholesome frat ever lol</p>
<p>Day 2 of AU-gust 2020 "College AU" </p>
<p>Thanks to the heroes of YGOCollabLove for supporting this bad idea too.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“You are the glass half empty, sippin my ocean dry , emotionally spin me so that our planets cannot align, but I guess I can stand you one more night. . . I like us better when we’re wasted.”</p>
<p> – “Wasted,” by Tiesto.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“An’ over here is the cafeteria!  It’s all you can eat while ya live in the dorms!”  Joey smiled brightly as he waved an arm towards the cafeteria dorm.  “But if yer not in the dorms, you gotta pay.” He shook his head in exaggerated sadness.  “Unless you can get some Frosh to swipe ya in!”</p>
<p>Seto nodded serenely.  They continued to walk around campus, heading back to the student union.  Joey was the best orientation leader on campus—known for making everyone feel welcome and comfortable.  This was why they were always giving him the most difficult transfer students, he was sure.  He was also the only transfer student who worked for the orientation office as part of his financial aid work-study plan.</p>
<p>“So uh… yer clearly a little older than the freshies here… are you a transfer student or something?”  Joey rubbed the back of his neck nervously.  “Not that I’m judging or anythin’! I’m a transfer student too! Saves a lotta money and you get the same degree anyway!”</p>
<p>Seto did not look at Joey, as if he was wholly preoccupied by observing the various bicyclists streaming past them.</p>
<p>“It was time for my brother to start as a freshman, and I determined that I might as well secure a diploma simultaneously.”</p>
<p>Joey laughed, not because Seto had said anything funny, but because he was trying to lighten the mood.  His partner didn’t offer anything else, and it was painfully awkward.  Joey looked down at the information the admissions office had given him. </p>
<p>“So ehhh, looks like you’re a computer science student.” Joey offered.</p>
<p>“That’s correct.” Seto said.</p>
<p>“Which means…  you any good at calculus?”</p>
<p>“I am excellent.”  Seto rolled his eyes.</p>
<p>“So uh, if you got the time… you think you could help me?  It’s a pre-req for a biology class I gotta take for my Child Development minor and…”</p>
<p>“A minor in Child Development? Are you studying to be a teacher?”  Seto’s voice was harsh with derision.</p>
<p>“Close—social worker!” Joey beamed a little extra.</p>
<p>Seto rolled his eyes, his ice finally freezing any further pleasantries.</p>
<p>. . .</p>
<p>Seto Kaiba hated Fireball whiskey.  He was a man of taste, and had no problem sipping quality whiskey with the best of them.  But four shots of fireball in at his brother’s initiation Frat Party left him entirely nauseated.</p>
<p>Cinnamon-tinted bile worked its way up his throat as he balanced against the sticky wall of the party.  Portraits of the last 50 Fraternity Presidents glared at him, and he had half a mind to projectile vomit on them.</p>
<p>The world was spinning, but if he put down the red solo cup of what Mokuba had affectionately called “Jungle Juice” he would be forced to interact with another living soul in the building, so he choked down the fireball with some of the alcoholic fruit punch.</p>
<p>That was a mistake.  If the world had been slightly off-balance before, the combined effect was really hitting, and the whole world was clearly spinning.  He didn’t dare dislodge himself from his spot on the wall.</p>
<p>“Kaiba?”  Joey approached.  Kaiba wanted to bite out some witty line about the profit margin on social work, but he didn’t totally trust himself to open his mouth.  “You ok?”</p>
<p>With a thick swallow, Kaiba looked over and bit out, “Fine.  How do you remember me from…”</p>
<p>“Yeah uh, I don’t give a lotta tours to CEO-billionaire transfer students, ya stuck out.”  Joey leaned in, clearly concerned.  “You don’t look so hot, you wanna sit down?  Have some water?” </p>
<p>Kaiba stepped away from the wall to get out of the situation, and maybe start walking back to his apartment.  Within two steps he stumbled.  His spatial reasoning was totally shot.</p>
<p>And so was all his good sense, melting into the strong arms that caught him.</p>
<p>“Yeah, let’s get ya some water, alright?  Man, you do not look like yer having a good time.”</p>
<p>“Still want me to tutor you in calculus?” Seto managed to say, leaning embarrassingly into his counterpart’s chest. </p>
<p>“Honestly, if you still understand it, in yer condition, then yeah, that’d be great.”</p>
<p>“Ha! It would be easy.”</p>
<p>“Look, I’m gay, okay, I can’t do math!” Joey laughed at his own joke.</p>
<p>“Pathetic! I am also gay, and I am the best at math.” Seto slurred, but sounded devastatingly serious.  Joey leaned the belligerent drunk into a chair in the dining room of the frat house.  “You don’t believe me?”</p>
<p>Joey raised his hands defensively, “I believe you!”</p>
<p>“No, you don’t.  I’ll prove it.  Bring me your homework.”</p>
<p>Joey wandered away.  At some point, he must have told his fraternity bros that Kaiba was going to do his calculus homework drunk, because Mokuba and a group came over.</p>
<p>Mokuba was wearing a Delta Mu shirt from their charity event last week—some sort of poker night—and his hair was even wilder than normal.  “Seto! This is so like you.  Did you really have to steal the spotlight at my initiation party?”</p>
<p>Seto looked up from a solo cup of water that Joey must have left behind.  “I am not here for any spotlight.  I’m going to prove a point.”</p>
<p>And with that, Joey reappeared with his old laptop wide open.  “The worksheet is open.  The software calculates your grade immediately after you press enter.”</p>
<p>“I know how the interface works, dumbass.”  Kaiba rolled his eyes and stretched his fingers in front of him.</p>
<p>“Ahh yer a mean drunk.  You might need a graphing calculator, by the way.”</p>
<p>“Then bring me a graphing calculator.”  Joey flipped him off, but left the room to get one.</p>
<p>The pledge-master, Tristan, stepped in.  “I dunno if this guy’s actually drunk, or just faking.”</p>
<p>“What incentive do I have to—”</p>
<p>“Moki-Moki, he’s your bro.  What do you think?  What would he never do if he was sober?” Tristan said.</p>
<p>“Talk about his feelings,” Mokuba said instantly, rolling his eyes and taking another sip to hide his smirk.</p>
<p>“Ok.  Well?”</p>
<p>Kaiba opened and shut his mouth a few times, before he announced, “I’m about to puke on this fool’s laptop.”</p>
<p>“Sounds like Seto.” Mokuba’s smirk blossomed into a smile at getting to make fun of his brother for once.</p>
<p>“FINE!”  The cold fire behind Seto’s eyes lit up.  “I am thissss close to making out with the hot blond dumb ass, but instead I’m going to do his homework.  Happy?”</p>
<p>“Moki?”</p>
<p>Mokuba’s smile vanished, and he wasn’t in any state to hide his shock.  “Checks out.  I’m … well I was… the only person who knew that Seto liked boys.”</p>
<p>Seto leaned into the computer.  “Great.  Bring me that graphing calculator and tequila shots for everyone.  I’m going to raise that guy’s grade 15%, and this is supposed to be a party.”</p>
<p>Joey reappeared with the calculator, and was shocked to see Seto actually making some headway on the problem set.  There were about fifteen problems.  Tristan put a neon plastic shot glass on the edge of the laptop, and without looking away from the screen, Seto slammed the shot.  If it burned his throat, he didn’t show it.</p>
<p>The gathered crowd looked at each other, holding matching neon shots awkwardly.  Tristan had clearly expected that Seto would have followed proper shots conduct and waited for the announcement. </p>
<p>Mokuba had years of experience with covering Seto’s faux pas.  “You saw the man! SHOTS!”  Everyone else downed them in tandom.</p>
<p>After a few minutes the group was chatting about other things and several of the brothers had entirely lost interest in watching Kaiba do calculus.  A smaller group of hold outs was extremely entertained, and Seto was going shockingly fast. </p>
<p>Within fifteen minutes the homework was complete.</p>
<p>“Done!” Seto shouted, pushing the graphic calculator across the table and was handed another tiny neon green shot glass, which he quickly downed.</p>
<p>Joey inspected the website.  It looked right enough.  “I dunno if I should submit this…” Joey waffled. </p>
<p>“Fool! Then we won’t know if I was right.” Seto looked unbearably offended.  </p>
<p>“But the academic honor code?”  Joey was actually nervous about this.</p>
<p>Seto leaned all the way back, and threaded his hands through his long hair.  “Screw the academic honor code.  I have money.”</p>
<p>“C’mon, don’t you wanna know if he’s the genius he’s supposed to be? Plus, no one else is going to know!” Tristan prodded.</p>
<p>Joey pressed enter.</p>
<p>The whole room paused while the site processed his answers.</p>
<p>“PERFECT SCORE!” Joey shouted, throwing his hands up!</p>
<p>The group had grown again and cheered, and Mokuba called for another round of celebratory shots, which served to drive the group back into the kitchen.</p>
<p>Joey and Seto were left alone.  Seto rested his head against the table and looked up at Joey.</p>
<p>“So… uh… ya wanna make out with me?” Joey blushed a little.</p>
<p>“I am literally going to puke, right now. Step aside.”  Seto shifted to get up.  He looked determined to make it to his feet, but it was not promising. </p>
<p>Joey leaned over to help.  “I can’t believe that you can do calculus, but ya can barely stand.  Yer ridiculous.”</p>
<p>“Still want me to tutor you?”</p>
<p>“So much.”</p>
<p>The end.</p>
<p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>You know the meme about how being queer makes you bad at math?  Kaiba has no tolerance for that meme.<br/>H/c- Joey doesn’t drink and his bros are super chill about it.  Whether or not he is the resident weed guy is left intentionally ambiguous 😉</p></blockquote></div></div>
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